Tomorrow is my Mom's birthday. I have a lot of feelings about that, but most of them I will not depress you with. I tried to not think about it to much. I tried to stay positive. I also tried to convince myself that it wasn't going to be hard. It is.
If my Mom was here:
I would find the sappiest birthday card to send her, it would make her cry.
I would call and have the most gorgeous flowers sent to her.
I would call tomorrow and wish her Happy Day.
She would be embarrassed that any attention was brought to her.
The conversation would quickly turn to me and how my family was doing.
I would think about her all day, because that is what birthday's are for.
She isn't here. So, I will do my best to do the only one of those things I can still do. Think about her all day. I might even cry a little. It feels good to cry. I miss her.
I am so glad to have this first behind us.
If my Mom was here:
I would find the sappiest birthday card to send her, it would make her cry.
I would call and have the most gorgeous flowers sent to her.
I would call tomorrow and wish her Happy Day.
She would be embarrassed that any attention was brought to her.
The conversation would quickly turn to me and how my family was doing.
I would think about her all day, because that is what birthday's are for.
She isn't here. So, I will do my best to do the only one of those things I can still do. Think about her all day. I might even cry a little. It feels good to cry. I miss her.
I am so glad to have this first behind us.
4 comments:
Yeah, I'm pretty bummed about the whole "first" thing. It's like we're on some sick time line or something. But that's a whole nother post, so I'll save it.
Happy Conference. I hope you eat turkey.
We pray for you always and hope you make it through all the "firsts". I know you will because you are a very strong person who knows who you are. And because of that knowledge you can do anything. We love you.
Hang in there Jill. You have beautiful children and a great husband to help you through all this. Stay strong. It's okay to cry because it does feel good to get it out.
I know it has to be so hard to go through all of these firsts, but you are doing an amazing job. I am sure that your mom it looking down right now and thinking of how proud she is of you.
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